Caring for the Soul Using Polytheism

Delivered at the Unitarian Fellowship of Lawrence on 8.05.12

Opening:

Somehow I feel like there’s this illusion that life is or should be clean and simple. That when we get ourselves into knots and situations, they are something to be gotten out of. Something to get through, and learn how to not ever get into again.

I don’t claim to be an expert on life but what I can tell you from my own experience is that life is not clean. It’s messy. And I don’t know about you, but anytime I think I’m through one knot, another one presents itself. So maybe it’s not about “getting through this”- whatever “this” is at the time- after all.  The fact is, “this” IS. Now, what am I going to do about how I handle it, so that I can energize, rather than drain, my soul? How can I learn to not try to get through the storm, but to dance in the rain?

One Wednesday in March, I had a rough morning. There were the usual arguments and getting everyone fed and lunches packed and off to school, and I had an important meeting first thing. Everyone was stressed, but I had my coffee so all was well enough.

Less than three hours later I was in the HR office being told that I no longer had a job, and because of the position I held, I was placed on administrative leave effective immediately. Please leave the premises NOW.  No, I may not go back to my office, and I may not speak to anybody before I leave.

I straightened my back and held my head high as I signed that paper. “You are absolutely correct. My values no longer correspond with the way operations are run here. I wish you luck”, I said. And I left, knowing I was much better off.

…Is what I would like to say happened.  What really happened is that I felt the weight of the world that had been on my shoulders- the responsibility of bringing in a paycheck and carrying health insurance, life insurance, retirement; the fact that I truly cared for my staff and didn’t just do my job because it was a job; the fact that we were out of peanut butter, and that my daughter won’t eat sandwiches anymore but also didn’t like anything else I ever got for lunches; the fact that there was always too much month left at the end of the money; the fact that I have been defined by what I do for so much of my life and when I’m not defined by that I don’t know who I am- I felt the full weight of all of it. At. That. Moment.

I cried. I don’t just mean tears running down my cheeks in a sweet kind of way. I mean I cried in a messy, bawly, tears streaming kind of way. I couldn’t stop them, and the more I tried, the harder I cried, and the angrier I was at myself for crying. They sent someone to my office to get my purse and jacket. I collected myself enough to leave the building. I felt absolutely empty.

The advice that I got from people over the days and weeks after that generally followed the same theme.

Take some time to focus on yourself.

How do I do that? They don’t teach that in school. I grew up what they call “unchurched”- I didn’t attend church regularly and wasn’t raised within a structured religion, but even if I had, from what I have learned it seems that the most they really teach in most religions is that the object of worship is outside of you. Put faith in that and you’ll feel better. They don’t teach you how. Just do it.

So the few people that I did ask “how do I do that?” had some interesting answers. Of course, I got the ones I expected- meditate, reflect, read. But the ones I found interesting were the ones that seemed almost eye-rollingly shallow when they were first suggested:
“Put on some lipstick.”
“Find an outfit that looks Fabulous on you”
“Go get your hair done, get a Mani/pedi”.  (I had to ask about this so if you’re like me and didn’t know- A mani/pedi is a manicure and pedicure. )

These suggestions seemed to be pretty, well, like I said- shallow. They may give a temporary ego or self-confidence boost, but other than that, what’s the point? I am not someone who is into makeup or fashion and I’ve NEVER had a pedicure.

But I got this advice over. And over. From really intelligent people that I respected. And not just women. So once I stopped pouting about the emptiness I was feeling, I looked past the actions that were being suggested and at what the intent and meaning may be.

Usually when we put on makeup, wear fabulous outfits, and get mani/pedi’s, there is a big event or a celebration. In theory these times would be filled with excitement and hope. The people giving me this advice were giving it to me because those are the feelings that following those actions would evoke for them.

Ahhh. This is part of ritual. I understand ritual.

Ritual is something that we, as humans, need.

David Frawley, in the text from which our first reading was excerpted, says:

Since prehistoric times, ritual has been perhaps the most important

human activity.  Throughout the world there has existed an ancient and

ongoing tradition of sacred action performed with the aim of improving

not only our condition in the universe, but the condition of the

universe itself.

He goes on to say that:

        Indeed, the further back we look, the more we examine traditional

and indigenous cultures, the more we find that human life has been

primarily a ritual or set of sacred actions.  Whether we consider the

aborigines of Australia, the Native Americans, the ancient Hindus and

Egyptians, or… [Europeans]…, we find a world-wide

preoccupation with ritual action that cuts across all races,

religions, and cultures. We could even say that human culture is

primarily a culture of ritual.

We have community rituals, family rituals, and individual rituals.

We teach rituals to our kids.

But Rituals are not necessarily about the actions themselves, but about the feelings and state of mind that are evoked. Thomas Moore sums it up nicely by saying “In church people do not eat bread in order to feed their bodies but to nourish their souls”.

Here’s the thing. We WILL find ritual, and if we’re not careful we can be drawn to “junk food”. Drugs. Eating disorders. Violence. Abuse. Cults. Obsessions.

So how do I focus on myself by working soulfulness into daily life, without falling into dysfunctional ritual?

Naturally, I turned to the great Taoist, Winnie the Pooh.

In Laura Driscoll's The Search for Tigger's Bounce , Tigger is feeling down, moody, and his tail is drooping. Pooh asks why, and Tigger says, “I think I’ve lost my bounce!”  He can recall when he last bounced and that he doesn't feel like bouncing now, but he doesn't know why. Tigger realizes that his bounce has gone away, and that it went away so suddenly he didn't know where he lost it. Eeyore, Piglet, Roo and Pooh set off to help Tigger find his bounce.

I won’t spoil the story for you if you haven’t read it, and if the library doesn’t have it, I’m sure they can get it for you.

My point is that we teach children to personify their feelings and experiences in stories and characters. And just as the ancients did, we personify energies that are not understood in order to explain them.

The book Care of the Soul by Thomas Moore gave me the piece I felt like I was missing. Throughout the book, Moore teaches through myth, but there is one part where he used a particular word and it gave me a new way of looking at how to begin.

Polytheism.

 I will admit, until reading this book I had thought of polytheism the way I was taught about the Greek gods in elementary school- That they were all sitting in the sky playing chess with humans as the pieces; the “multi” equivalent to the big guy in the sky with the beard and the “smite” button.

Moore calls the version he talks about “psychological polytheism”. He draws from those ancient myths and stories and uses them as a way to identify aspects of an individual psyche.  This helps us to understand and appreciate the sheer complexity of the soul. If we look at different aspects of ourselves from a polytheistic point of view, we can also see how acceptance and flexibility are so vital to the soul. “The gods and goddesses of Greek mythology may fight”, as Moore says, ”but they recognize each other’s validity”.

Moore suggests that the model is a psychological rather than religious model. “Stated simply, it means that psychologically we have many different claims made on us from a deep place. It is not possible, nor is it desirable, to get all of these impulses together under a single focus. Rather than strive for unity of personality, the idea of polytheism suggests living within multiplicity.”

This works for me, and it makes sense.

Hera is a pretty well- known example to use here. She’s notorious for her jealous rages, but who wouldn’t be jealous married to a guy like Zeus? Hera’s jealousy keeps Zeus in check (to some extent), her jealousy is protective of the home.

But it’s not enough for this to be a purely psychological exercise. I can almost imagine this “psychological polytheism” as a group therapy session taking place in my head.

Polytheism today is a reverence for everyday life. It’s seeing the magical in everything.

And how do I do that? How do I work reverence and sacred into everyday life?

I figured that ancient rituals were a good enough place to start, since that’s what ancient polytheists did. I came across some fascinating ones...

For instance, one where they would go into nature and find a clearing, and lay out a cloth. They would then put out offerings of food they had brought along with them. They would then spend hours dancing, playing and consuming the food.

I believe today we call this a picnic.

Caring for the soul doesn’t have to be mysterious.

It turns out we really don’t have to go very far, or make too many changes. If we focus more on fact that some actions might speak to the soul without having much outward effect on life, maybe we can give a little more to the soul daily. Dinner becomes a ritual because of how it’s presented. Ice cream before bed becomes a ritual when certain bowls are used, and stories are told.

Many who practice Earth-based spirituality honor the God and the Goddess by preserving the planet. Many people practice dietary restrictions based upon religious or moral values. The common theme is an understanding that the individual soul is inseparable from the world’s soul. Now, I don’t believe that anyone is an expert enough on the soul to be able to speak authoritatively on the subject, but I do know that we are all recycled stardust.  I think Dr. Neil Degrasse Tyson said it best when he said:

So that when I look up at the night sky and I know that yes, we are part of this universe, we are in this universe, but perhaps more important than both of those facts is that the Universe is in us. When I reflect on that fact, I look up – many people feel small because they’re small and the Universe is big – but I feel big, because my atoms came from those stars.

So once you understand this, that everything is worthy of worship, then take it another step and remember that we are all stardust. You, me, the trees, the Earth. So all that is worthy of worship out here, is also within. Not only is the world, is life, worthy of your worship, is it able to give you strength beyond what you thought possible… but it is also within you.  You. You have the strength to heal; to heal yourself, to ease pain in this aching world. And you are worthy of every bit of worship and gratitude that you bestow upon yourself by doing so.

Closing:

When I was writing this sermon, my daughter asked what it was about. I gave her the quick run-down: blah blah blah, ritual, blah blah blah, myth, blah blah blah, stardust… and she says “so find your passion and work it into your everyday life?”.

Yeah. That’s pretty much it.

May Peace be with you.